Saturday, July 14, 2012

Full Body Sweat #5

They say that Thailand has three seasons, Hot, Hotter, and Damn Hot.  As hot as Thailand is, if you plan properly, you can spend the day out and about and stay relatively cool.  On this particular day, I planned poorly.

My Chinese visa had expired, so I needed to go to the Embassy.  It's located in downtown Bangkok, so I planned to take the Airport Link to avoid traffic.  I thought I was being clever, but it turned out to be a big mistake.

I had to park about 300 yards from Ladkrabang Station, and by the time I got to the tracks, I could feel the first beads of sweat trickle down my forehead and back.  Making matters worse, the next train wasn't for another 20 minutes - and it was an open air station.  Let the deluge begin.  This was the day's first full body sweat.

It's a 30 minute ride to central Bangkok, which gave me enough time to dry off, but not after getting continuous stares from the Thai passengers, who, like me, had also waited at the broiling station, but had stayed dry in their tanned, water-tight skin suits.

From Makasan Station, I had to walk about 200 yards in the mid-morning heat, which was already near 90, to the motorcycle taxi stand, and the first beads of perspiration appeared across my brow.  You would think that a wind-swept ride on the back of a motorcycle would cool you off, but holding on to my documents with one hand and the back of the motorcycle with the other and occasionally getting stuck behind the exhaust of a city bus, finished off with a brisk walk up the un-air conditioned stairs to the 3rd floor Visa section of the embassy meant full body sweat #2

One hour in the embassy and I was able to cool off again.  While waiting for my new visa, I noticed that although the sweat had dried, it had left a series of salt rings beneath my man breasts and on the knees of my jeans.

Once I finished at the embassy, I had a quick lunch, and without waiting 30 minutes, I jumped back into the pool for full body sweat #3.  This time the motorcycle ride wasn't so bad, but the walk through the enormously empty Makasan station got my heart racing.  Arriving at the open-air platform, I was, surprisingly, still dry, but once again, I had to wait 20 minutes for the next train.  Nearby, the Thais stood quietly and watched in amazement as I bathed fully-clothed beneath an invisible shower head.

I stepped off the train at Ladkrabang station just as the last molecule of sweat evaporated from my salt-stained shirt.  At the edge of the elevated platform, I stared across the adjacent parking lot and saw the inevitable.  My car was but a spec at the far end of a sea of cars, shimmering beneath a cloudless sky.  My 4th full body sweat was a reversal of the first, but instead of a steamy train platform to get my sweat glands pumping, it was my sauna-like car that had been baking, unprotected beneath the blistering mid-day sun.

By the time I arrived at work, I was dry again, and for once, as I made my way from my air-conditioned car to my air-conditioned office, I was able to brave the merciless Thai sun with only a thin layer of moisture instead of another full body sweat.

I settled myself in at my desk and began reading the day's emails.  Moments later, I received a phone call regarding a quality issue on the factory floor.   I hung up the phone, took a long drink of water, and prepared myself for full body sweat #5.


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