Sunday, May 3, 2009

7 Days Of Prayer

The series of sermons, merit making, rituals and ceremonies for Nuch's father's funeral came to a conclusion today with the placing of his ashes inside one of the Buddha statues at the local temple.

The whole process took about 5 months - due, primarily, to the schedule of the Princess who was not available until the end of April. I've been to a few funerals in Thailand, but this is the first time I was intimately involved. Let's just say that there's a lot more that goes into it than I had ever imagined.

At Nuch's request, I've taken pictures throughout most of it, and she has asked me to post them to document the whole affair and share it with people who were not able to attend. I've been fortunate to have not attended many funerals in the US, but I can't imagine someone walking around taking pictures during a family's moment of grief. In Thailand, there was me along with some professional photographers from Nuch's brother's printing company at almost every event. So, apparently, it's socially acceptable.

Nuch's father passed away on November 30th. Over the 7 days that followed, nightly prayer services were held at a local temple. People would come at their convenience to give their condolences and pay their respects.

Nuch's dad had a large family (7 brothers and sisters) with a similar number of aunts and uncles on both of his parent's sides of the family. That coupled with his former students and colleagues from the Art University in Bangkok meant that each night the temple altar room was filled with mourners.



They would come and listen to the chants of the monks and give a donation to Nuch's mother, which would cover funeral costs or be donated to the temple. Not everyone, but close friends and family members would send large wreaths.



There was not a funeral home director like you would imagine in the US. Instead, there was an old man and his wife who lived at the temple and took care of all the arrangements. The old man had a bad limp and was missing most of his teeth. Back home, I'm sure he would have been mistaken for the gravedigger. His wife, who was half his age and twice his size, took care of the rituals - in particular, all the "good voodoo" that went on when the body was placed in the casket.

Here is the coffin. Although everyone wore black or dark colors, the coffin was lit up and decorated with colorful flowers.

It was certainly a somber occasion, but it was also a time for family and old friends who have not seen each other for a long time to come together and catch up. I got the impression that most people had not seen each other for years. Although most everyone was from Bangkok, it seems the only time that they see each other is during weddings and funerals.


Every night before we left, Nuch would leave some food (always his favorites dishes) for her father's spirit, and every night this cat would sneak in a share a nibble.


After the 7 nights of prayers were completed, Nuch's father was placed in a special sanctuary where his body would wait to be cremated. I've posted about it already, but every 50 days, we held a merit making ceremony to make sure his spirit was at peace during this period between this life and full-time residency in the afterlife.
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